Trip to Florida!

One of my absolute favorite parts of this summer was my trip to Florida to visit my friend Kristin. My ten day trip had been planned for a few months, and we were both excited for our little vacation together. Just a little background information on our friendship: Prior to my trip, Kristin and I had only met in person one other time. We had talked for numerous hours on Facebook, texted frequently, and spoke on the phone a few times. We met online on Facebook via a Company support page for the Army. Kristin and I found that we had a lot in common and have become very close friends since then. Some people might find it weird that we met online and have gotten so close, and that's okay...but the things we find we have in common make us laugh sometimes. For example, our parents have the same rugs in their houses and we used to have the same shower curtains as well. Yes, weird and extremely random.

Anyway, when I went to visit Kristin, her husband was away at training for the Army and it was truly a girls vacation together. The weather was not extremely kind to us the first few days I was there, but we went to the beach anyway, despite the cloudy skies.

Kristin taught me many things while I was in Florida. The first of these was how to skim-board. I guess I should say she attempted to teach me to do many things. I made a fool out of myself every time I fell or completely missed the board, but it provided for a good laugh at least!

Pretending I know what I'm doing

Kristin, looking like a pro

Another thing Kristin taught me was how to find sand dollars in the ocean. I didn't even know these things were live creatures until my trip! I found a few and of course got some pictures holding them.

Sand dolla dolla bills!

A few other things that Kristin taught me that I sadly didn't document with pictures were how to cook spaghetti squash (one of my new favorite meals!) and that I need to be in much better shape to attempt a boot camp class again. I'd say I was sore for a few days after that one!

I sometimes struggle when I run and discovered that it mostly happens when I have not hydrated enough. Kristin got me in the habit of carrying around a gallon of water wherever I go. It has made a HUGE difference in my running. And people think I'm even stranger than they did before. Hey, you win some you lose some!

The weekend I was in Florida, we traveled from Fort Myers (where Kristin lived) and drove to Daytona Beach to visit my friend Becky from college. Saturday we drove to Orlando and I got to experience Disney World for the first time! I wish I could say it was everything I hoped it would be and more, but it stormed a lot while we were there and a lot of the rides were closed. Thankfully we still got to see one of the shows at the castle, ride a few of the really good rides, and I got to hang out with Dumbo. Even though it stormed and we got soaked, I really did have an awesome time with these ladies. I am hoping to go back sometime when it is not storming and experience all that "The Happiest Place on Earth" has to offer!

Trying on fun hats with Kristin

Me, Becky, and Kristin in front of the castle

Kristin, Becky, and I spent the rest of the weekend just relaxing and hanging out. We witnessed yet another storm on Sunday evening as we were cooking a delicious meal. Becky demonstrated her cooking skills which may lead to a cooking show of her very own, and Kristin showed us that she may have a future as a stunt double (I will have to figure out how to upload these videos!). Monday morning we sadly said goodbye to Becky and headed back to Fort Myers...but not before a stop at some AWESOME outlets!

Trying on clothes at the outlets

Back in Fort Myers it was fun getting dressed up and having some girls nights out and just hanging out with a good friend. I can honestly say that this wasn't one of those vacations where I had a good time but was ready to go home when the time came. Had I not already booked a round-trip flight, I probably would have stayed in Florida longer. This was truly one of the best vacations I've ever taken, because I was able to relax and have fun. I never really thought about what it would be like to live near the beach, but now that I've experienced ten days of it, I think I could get used to it ;) Kristin has since moved to North Carolina and I am hoping to visit her there sometime very soon! Oh, and Kristin and I recorded a cover together. You can watch it here!

Beach bar!

Before we went out one night

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

So I'm a Runner Now?!

In order to catch you all up on everything that's happened this summer, I have to back up to May which seems like forever ago! Back on New Year's Eve I made the decision to run the Cleveland Half-Marathon. It was two days before my 25th birthday, I was in search of a goal to motivate me, and for some reason it seemed like a good idea at the time (the chocolate pudding shots I had been partaking in may have been one of those reasons!). Once I registered for the race, I was definitely more motivated to run. Keep in mind that up until I registered for the race I never would have considered myself a runner and could barely make it two miles on the treadmill at a 10-minute pace.

Fast-forward four and a half months. On Saturday, May 19th I headed up to Cleveland with my friend Haley from high school. Haley registered for the race shortly after I did and we ran together a couple times leading up to race day. Our first stop was the race expo at the IX Center. We picked up our racing packets, got LOTS of free tuna (no complaints from me...or Bella, for that matter!), and got some awesome matching sparkly headbands--because every runner needs one of those! After the expo we headed to Progressive Field to watch our beloved Tribe take on the Marlins. We had awesome seats in the outfield, but had to be super careful about staying hydrated in the brutal sun. Our other friend from high school, Heather (who was also running the half), met us at the game. It was Faith Night at the Indians' Game, and post-game we got to enjoy a concert by Christian singer Brandon Heath. It was nice to be around so many other people who love the Lord and who were singing along as he sang.

Haley and Me at the Expo

After the game it was time to head back to the hotel and sleep to prepare for the big day. I can honestly say I didn't sleep nearly as much as I thought I should have that night, and was a little concerned about my performance the next day. When I first registered for the race my goal was just to finish it without walking. In my mind, 13 miles was super far and I would have been proud of myself for just completing it. Well, my competitive side got the best of me and I came up with another goal to complete the race in under two hours. The morning of the race we woke up around 4:30 so we could eat, digest, and get to the starting line on time. I ended up starting the race by myself since I planned on running at a different pace than Haley and Heather. My friend from grad school, Katie, met up with me prior to the race but had her own group to run with, so I was again on my own. I knew that my parents would be somewhere along the course cheering me on, as would my aunt. As a runner, I've found that I can pretty much tell from the very beginning of a run whether it is going to be a "good" run day or a "not so good" run day. This was a "good" run day. I spent the first six miles watching the crowds in search of my parents. They were not exactly sure where they would be watching from so I just kept a lookout. When I finally spotted them around mile 6 I noticed their bright pink "GO JB" sign. I smiled and waved, then kept on running--I had a time to beat! My aunt had told me she would be somewhere around mile 6 or 7, so I kept looking for her. I spotted her less than a mile later and was so encouraged by her. My aunt runs regularly and has done her own share of half and full marathons. She ran with me for a minute, told me how great I looked, and I went on my way.

Heather, Haley, and Me before the race

I'll admit that I struggled a bit after that because the excitement of looking for people in the crowd had gone. Mile 10 provided us with a lovely hill and a lot of people started walking. I'll admit that seeing so many others walking up the hill was a huge temptation, but I knew that the hills of New Concord had trained me well for the challenge. So, with a little help from Kelly Clarkson I made it up that hill. I saw my parents again right around Mile 12 and that kept me going until I hit 13.1! The boys of One Direction serenaded me (through my headphones, sadly) as I crossed the finish line. As I collected my finisher's medal I was so overwhelmed by emotion, and I'll admit that I teared up a bit. I truly felt that all of the training I had put into the race had paid off and I was so proud of myself for achieving my goal. I found out later that I finished the race in two hours and eight minutes--a little above my goal time, but I was still proud. I met up with my parents, my aunt, and Katie for some pictures, then waited to cheer Haley and Heather on as they finished the race. The rest of the day included a very sweaty ride home and some ice on the knees (what retired gymnast decides to take up running as their new sport?!).

After the race, with a sign my parents made

After the race, with my Aunt Nanci

Prior to running the half I told everyone that it would be the furthest I ever run. Why in the world would I want to run a FULL marathon?! Good question...but I'm doing it :) October 21, 2012. Columbus, Ohio. Yet again, goal is to finish without walking. We'll see how long it takes for a goal time to be included! All joking aside though, these past seven months have taught me that I truly can do anything I set my mind to. I know that sounds cliche, but I never thought that within one calendar year I would a. Start running, b. Run a half marathon, and c. Run a FULL marathon. I never thought I'd run a full marathon in my lifetime! But for those of you who have thought about running and just don't think you'd be good at it or don't think you could finish a 5k...you are wrong! There are so many different training plans you can try. I know a lot of people who have tried the Couch to 5k training plan and were surprised with how well they did. So do me a favor and give it a shot...you truly have nothing to lose :)

Momma Extravaganza!

Every year around this time I struggle because I have to come up with both a birthday gift and Mother's Day gift for my wonderful mother. Sometimes, if I'm really lucky, it even falls on the same day (which also happened to be the same day as my college graduation). This year, since I took my dad to do something for his birthday (see previous post) I decided to do the same with my mom. Her birthday isn't until Thursday, so she doesn't get to find out until then (and since she reads my blog religiously, neither do you!). We will be spending the day Saturday doing something fun together and I'm looking forward to spending the day with her since I don't get to do that as often as I used to. I love my mom to death, and even though we drive each other crazy sometimes, I know she's always there for me. To say that the beginning of 2012 was rough would be an understatement, but my mom (and my dad, as well) was there for me through it all. I am blessed to have awesome parents and know that I wouldn't be where I am today without them.

Because my mom loves this song (and because she's a sap and I love to make her cry), I recorded one of her favorite songs in honor of her birthday/Mother's Day. So here it is! I love you, Mom!

Not sure why I can't put the video on here right now, but Click Here to see it. Will work on getting this fixed!

Happy [Belated] Birthday, Dad!

So I know that I am way late on this, but I wanted to dedicate a post to my wonderful father for his birthday (which was over a month ago...oops!). My dad has always been super supportive of me, whether it was coaching my softball teams growing up, sitting for countless hours waiting for my four minutes of fame at my gymnastics competitions, or encouraging me to play guitar or sing. I have many wonderful memories with my dad growing up, and many of those include going to Indians games or spending time on the softball field. This year the Cleveland Indians home opener was on my dad's birthday, and I thought it would be an excellent way to celebrate, so I took my parents to the game. The weather was a little chilly, but we had great seats in the sun that gave us an excellent view of the field. Though we didn't pull out a win and sat in front of some obnoxious fans from Toronto, we had a great time and I was happy to make more memories with my dad (and mom!).

The parents

 

Dad and me before the game

Me and Momma

Why I Will Never Fly Delta Again

Last night I had what I would probably consider my worst experience with Customer Service. Back in February I had to cancel a flight to Gerogia that I had booked through Orbitz on Delta Airlines. The airline refused to give me any sort of refund and instead credited my account so that I could use it towards another flight within a year. I decided to fly to Florida in June to visit a few friends that live there. While looking at flights yesterday the prices were pretty good so I decided it was the time to book. Orbitz's website told me that in order to book a flight with canceled flight credit I would need to call their Customer Service. I spoke to three Orbitz representatives before I was informed that I would need to talk directly to Delta. They gave me Delta's phone number and the record locator I would need. I called Delta with the expectation that booking my flight would be a breeze from there.

My call was answered very quickly, which I was pleasantly surprised by. However, that's where the pleasant part of my experience with Delta ended. The representative asked me for my airline ticket number and I began to give him the number that Orbitz had given me. He interrupted me part of the way through and told me that it was not the right number, that the number he asked for would start with "062." I had my confirmation email from Orbtiz pulled up on my computer and found a number that said "Airline Ticket Number" but it did not start with "062." I informed the representative that I had a number by that name but that it started with "767." The representative then became rude and told me that he needed the Airline Ticket Number, not the Record Locator because the date of the canceled flight had already passed. I informed him that the only numbers I had were the ones I had tried to give him. Again, the representative was rude and I asked to speak to his supervisor. Instead of passing me on, he asked me WHY I wanted to speak to his supervisor. I told him that I felt he was being extremely rude when I was trying to find the information that he was asking me for. The representative THEN told me that he needed this information in order to process my request and that I needed to stop telling him how to do his job. I informed the representative that I was not trying to tell him how to do his job, but that I don't work for an airline and therefore don't know what all of the codes mean and was looking through my email to try to find the number he was asking for. In the middle of that statement, the "customer service" representative hung up on me!

At this point, I'm pretty angry. Being assertive is not something I have always been good at, and in the past I probably would have started crying when being treated so terribly. I can be rude if I need to be, but I did my best to remain calm and try to explain to this representative what I was looking at. Apparently that warranted being hung up on. I called Delta back and was thankfully assisted by a different representative. I informed this representative that I had been hung up on during my last call and she apologized but asked no details about what happened. I did get my flight booked, thankfully, and it turns out the Airline Ticket Number I was trying to give the last representative was the correct one after all. Apparently they drop off the "062" on all the numbers since they all start with that. I wish there was a way to call back said representative and actually tell him how to do his job. Instead I wrote a complaint to Delta Airlines this morning and assured them that I would never fly through their airline again. The only reason I called back and booked through them after my experience with rude representative was because I already had $400 wrapped up in my canceled flight from February. I have to say that I was extremely disappointed with the service I was given and the way I was treated. When posting about my experience on my Facebook page I got comments from others saying they have also had negative experience with Delta. All of these reasons, my friends, are why I will never fly Delta again. Please feel free to pass this blog on to any of your family or friends and encourage them to do the same!

Big News!!

I never thought I would have a Cnidaria as a sibling. For all of you non-scientists (like myself), that's a jellyfish. I suppose it's kind of like having a dog sibling, like Scout...except that this one can inflict a lot of pain (Scout doesn't do that), and could potentially be deadly. I mean, look at poor Dory! She almost died!

All kidding aside, I am excited to say that I am finally going to have a brother! A real, live, human (I think) brother! As of yesterday afternoon, my lovely big sister Erin (she sometimes goes by the alias Eloise) is engaged! She and Bryan have been dating for close to nine years and they are finally going to tie the knot! I am super excited for my big sister because she is an awesome person who deserves the world. She has a guy who appreciates her for the amazing person that she is and I am looking forward to the day I call him my brother (although let's face it, he kind of is already)!

I visited my sister in DC a couple weeks ago over my Spring Break with a friend. While I was visiting, Bryan informed me that he would be traveling to Akron two weeks later to ask my parents' permission to marry my sister. I was not allowed to tell my parents and obviously couldn't tell my sister. It has been painful to hold it in, and I was thankful this past weekend when my parents finally found out. Keeping a secret from my mother while she is stressing out about things is not an easy thing to do. And for those who know my mother and are wondering, yes, she is already stressing out about the wedding. Within 24 hours of Bryan's visit she was already worrying about a mother-of-the-bride dress. Sorry to call you out, Mom, but it's kind of hilarious! Now that my sister is officially engaged, the wedding planning can commence! Thankfully I LOVE weddings and am already on the ball. Erin and Bryan met while working at Target, so I decided that, naturally, their colors should be red and khaki. Erin is obviously thrilled with the idea and can't wait to walk down the aisle to her groom who will be wearing khaki and a red polo while carrying her bouquet of plastic flowers from the $1 spot.

Okay, back to being serious again. I am ridiculously excited for my sister and can't wait to go through the wedding planning process and stand by her side as she says "I do" to the jelly-man! We will definitely make lots of memories and I look forward to keeping you all updated as the process continues.

As if helping to plan the wedding won't be stressful enough, I've got about 18 months to find myself a date! Applications are being accepted!

The future Mr. & Mrs. Arroyo

Note to Self

I saw this quote today and it really spoke to me and I thought others might be able to relate to it as well. Losing someone you value is hard. It's difficult to leave behind someone you care about, to recognize that a huge portion of your life is gone, to fill the hole that the person's departure left in your life. But what I've learned recently is that doing those things when you've lost yourself is even more difficult. How can you pick up the pieces and move forward when you don't even know how to put the pieces back together because you don't know what they are supposed to form? I am guilty of losing myself in some of my past relationships. I put the other person ahead of myself 100% of the time, and I recognize now that that is not the key to a healthy or successful relationship. Because if that is the type of relationship you're in, at some point it's going to end. And then you're left with only yourself--except you don't have a self because you've let this other person become your whole world.

Right now I'm living my life focusing on myself for the first time in a long time. I'm reminding myself that I am special and that any person of value in my life will value me, too. I'm finding myself again, learning who I am, and any person that wants to be a part of my life in the future will love me for exactly that. I challenge you all to expect the same from those you value.

And now I'll end with a quote from the wise Kid Cudi: "The three things a guy should want to change about his girl are her last name, address, and her outlook on men." Deep, Cudi, really deep. But true.

Happy Hump Day, everyone (and Pi Day, too)!

Now is Right On Time

It would have been so easy, over the last few months, to dwell on "wasted time." Five years spent in a relationship that went nowhere sounds like a waste, right? I'll admit that, at first, that was my focus. I couldn't believe I let myself miss out on opportunities to meet great guys because I couldn't get past the situation I was in. But this quote really hit home for me. If it wasn't for everything I went through during that time--each moment, each unique circumstance--I wouldn't be where I am right now. I wouldn't know more about myself, I wouldn't know what I want (and very clearly don't want) in a relationship. Right now, at this moment, I'm in a good place. I feel positive about my future and am confident that God has something awesome in store for me, whatever that may be. I'll admit that I'm a bit nervous not knowing what the future holds when for so long I thought I did, but I'm excited to find out! My journey, over the last five years, over the last 24 years, has prepared me for whatever lies ahead. I don't have regrets, I'm not looking back. I'm looking forward, moving on, and taking with me the lessons that life has taught me so far. Now is right on time.

Strength in the Struggle

To say that the last several months have been a struggle would be an understatement. To make a long story short, my life became a roller coaster that I don't remember getting on and then my world was turned completely upside down by someone I trusted. Now, this person, who I thought was a permanent fixture in my life, is nowhere to be seen (If you want the details, go ahead and ask. I am really not concerned about upholding this person's reputation!). Have you ever thought you knew someone really well, only it turns out that they were actually the complete opposite of what you thought? Like to the point where you look at their picture now and don't even recognize them and kinda sorta maybe despise them? Yeah. That happened. And it sucked.

To be completely honest though, this hurt. I mean, more than I've ever been hurt before, and I can't say that I am completely healed because the actions of this person completely blindsided me. There were days at the beginning where I couldn't see things getting better, where I would just lay in my bed and cry, or stare at the ceiling while a million questions ran through my mind. None of it made sense, and it still doesn't really. I mean, to think that any human being could behave this way, let alone someone who I let into my life for five years, is outrageous. For the most part, I'm better. Sure, I still catch myself changing songs that remind me of this person, or see something they would have liked and get a little sad, but then I remember that this person isn't worth any of that. I recognize the fact that it's not him I miss, but the person I thought he was who doesn't even exist! Every minute of our lives we spend being sad is 60 seconds of happiness we will never have, right? Right. And let me tell you, this person does NOT deserve to take away any more of my happiness.

As hard as it has been, I know I'll be better off because of it. Do I really need someone like that in my life? The answer, my friends, is NO. I recognize now that I deserve (and really any decent person in the world deserves this) people in my life that are going to appreciate me, value me, and respect me. I've learned a lot about myself--my wants, needs, and expectations--over the last few months and I am thankful for that. I know that I can approach any sort of relationships in the future in a different way and will likely be better for it. It took me awhile to realize it, but it's okay to cry, it's okay to be sad and feel completely broken. I think it's part of the healing process, and without it it's hard to move forward. With that being said, this is an old song by Lindsey Haun that I kind of love and has been an obsession of mine when life gets tough, so I thought today, "hey, why not record it?" So I did. Please don't mind my less than perfect guitar playing and my crazy, static, the wind hates me hair.

Oh, and Happy Friday everyone!Cheers to the freakin' weekend!

Some Pages Turned, Some Bridges Burned, Some Lessons Learned

I am not a big believer in wasting time. I like to be productive, to use the time I have to do something worthwhile, to learn things from every experience I have. With that being said, I am struggling with the fact that I just got out of a five year relationship that went virtually nowhere, and am forcing myself to look back on those years to recognize what I really got out of them. First and foremost, if it were not for this relationship I do not know if or when I would have accepted Christ into my life. I cannot say that I became a Christian because of the example that was set for me in my relationship, but I highly doubt I would have ever gone to Campus Crusade for Christ in college if a certain guy had not been on the worship team. For that I am thankful, because I feel that knowing Christ has made the last five years more bearable and helps me through even the hardest times. Out of my relationship I also got my lovely kitty, Bella. This little love makes me smile and laugh on a daily basis and is always waiting for me at the door when I get home from work. Sure, I may look like a cat lady sometimes, but I get unconditional love from a crazy creature who knows when I am having a rough day and need some snuggle time. Of course there were more things I got from the relationship, including plenty of material things such as jewelry and clothes and enough stuffed animals to provide a safe landing for a skydiver with a broken parachute. In all seriousness though, I learned some valuable life (and relationship) lessons that I will carry with me in the future, and I hope that by sharing them at least one other person will learn something and will not fall into the same trap I did for so long.

So, ladies and gentlemen, here we go.

Lesson #1: Make sure you are completely over your last relationship before getting into a new one.


Yes, I know that after a breakup it is very easy to want to jump right back into another one. You miss the feeling of having someone else around, you feel like crap because you just got dumped and want someone to validate the fact that you are a worthwhile person, but what kind of relationship is it really going to turn out to be? You cannot look to someone else to value your own feelings of self-worth and importance. These are things you need to find for yourself and do for yourself. You cannot expect someone else to love you wholly and completely until you can love yourself that way. We teach others how to treat us and if they watch us talk down about ourselves or treat our bodies with no respect, how can we expect them to treat us any differently? Before this last relationship I was involved with another guy for about two and a half years. That relationship was FULL of emotional and verbal abuse and left me feeling completely broken and worthless. I was only single for about three to four months before I got involved with this relationship. I cannot say that this ultimately led to the end of my relationship or was even a big reason for it, but it definitely made starting the new relationship difficult. There were trust issues I had to overcome that had nothing to do with the new guy in my life, and it was almost like he had to work hard to prove to me that I was worth something even though he was not the one that led me to believe I was worthless in the first place. I guess all I'm really trying to say is that you need to help yourself heal from past relationships rather than expecting another person to fill that void for you.

Lesson #2: Exes are exes for a reason.

Maybe you ended your relationship on good terms: you get along well, you have fun together, but ultimately cannot see yourself spending the rest of your life with the other person, so you break up. But you'll always be friends, right? WRONG. It may be difficult to say goodbye to someone who played such an important part in your life for a long time, but staying friends with exes complicates things both for yourself and for any person you may be involved with in the future. I tried being comfortable with my significant other staying friends with his ex, but it ended up leading to more problems than it was worth. After being paranoid about it all the time and seeing text messages from her proclaiming her love for him, I decided it was time to ask him to remove her from his life. Now ladies, if a guy refuses to remove someone from their life who is a potential hazard to your relationship, that is a MAJOR RED FLAG. If a guy wants to make a relationship with you work and you are telling him you are uncomfortable with something, he will hear your concern and do something about it. He will not fly across the country to Vegas with his ex to visit her sister, he will not allow his ex to stay best friends with his mom, and he WILL NOT invite his ex to go places/do things that he has not invited you to do. Yes, I know this all seems very obvious, but sometimes giving in just a little bit turns into putting up with a lot of things you shouldn't have to. The last thing you want is to try to accept that this person who shares so much history with your guy is going to remain a part of his life, continually try to force her way into your relationship, refuse to let go, and then before you know it he PROPOSES to her while you are under the impression that the two of you are still dating. Trust me, exes only lead to complications. If it's not working out say goodbye and move on with your life. Exes are exes for a reason and there is absolutely NO REASON why they should continue to haunt current relationships. If you or your significant other is holding onto an ex, there is a reason for it. Step away, figure it out, and then move on when you are ready. Don't drag someone else into your own personal baggage or allow them to drag you into theirs.

Lesson #3: There is a difference between compromise and sacrifice.

Yes, all relationships require some compromise. Regardless of how wonderful your relationship may be, there are always going to be things that you and your significant other disagree on. It's normal, and it's going to mean making compromises even when you don't want to. However, there is a different between making a compromise and ALWAYS sacrificing your own wants or needs. If you feel like you are always the one giving in, always the one whose wants and needs get pushed to the side, there is a problem. A relationship is a two-way street, and if you are dating someone who is on a one-way road (a "their-way" road) all the time, it's time to drive the opposite direction. Relationships require give and take. Yes, we say that it's better to give than receive, but if you are constantly giving and never receiving then it's time to take a look at how much your significant other really values you.


Lesson #4: Honesty is the best policy.

I'm sure you've all heard that one before. So why is it so hard? Sure there are things we have done in the past or do while in a relationship that we're not proud of and are embarrassed to come clean about. But am I alone here when I say that the truth ALWAYS seems to come out? My philosophy is to be up-front about things in the first place. Being honest shows someone that you trust them enough to accept who you really are and that you value them enough to believe that they are worth the truth. It is much easier to explain a situation up front than it is when your significant other hears it from someone else and is now not only wondering WHY it happened but also why you didn't tell them about it. If you are afraid that being honest is going to cause your significant other to be angry with you or maybe even end your relationship, then deal with it. Everyone deserves to know who it is they are really spending their time with. It's a lot easier to work through a situation right after it happens than trying to explain why you lied or didn't come clean. Not being honest indicates that you have something to hide, which always begs the question of whether or not you are likely to do it again. Coming clean shows that you recognize your mistake, are sorry for it, and have learned your lesson. Sometimes the truth hurts, but lies and secrets...the damage does not even compare.


Lesson #5: Never date a guy who looks in the mirror more than you do.

I'm sure a lot of you laughed when you read this, but how many of you know people like this?! As a stereotypical girl, I tend to look in the mirror a lot. I want to make sure my outfit looks okay, check my hair straightening skills, see if that zit is covered up good enough, decide whether I'm having a fat day or skinny day. When I'm done doing all of those things and my guy who does not wear makeup, straighten his hair, is solid muscle, and dresses like someone straight out of an Express ad is STILL looking in the mirror, something is UP! A guy who is that concerned about his own appearance lacks self-confidence and will likely spend more time fishing for compliments than he does noticing how good you look. It's really easy to feel self-conscious about your own appearance when you are surrounded by someone who is very concerned with their own. Now I like a guy who respects himself enough to put together a nice outfit and look good for a night out with you, but there is a line that should not be crossed.

I mean, really?!

In five years there have definitely been a lot more lessons I have learned, but I think this sums up a few of them for now. I don't want to give anyone the wrong idea and say that my relationship was absolutely horrible and miserable because I would not have stayed in it as long as I did if that were the case. Were there red flags throughout that time? 100% yes. Were there times that I sacrificed more than I compromised? Most definitely. But were there numerous times where I felt completely loved and happy and satisfied in my relationship? Without a doubt. I guess what I'm trying to do here is recognize the things that I got out of this relationship, rather than focusing on the fact that I invested five years of my life in a relationship that didn't work out. Do I still wish this person the best in life? Deep down, yes, even though right now I would probably say I wish him the worst. Everyone makes mistakes and everyone has the opportunity to learn from them. In this instance I am taking the mistakes I have made and the lessons I've learned from them and using them to my advantage. I hope that some of you can learn a thing or two from my experiences, as well.

Bring It On, 2012

I have to admit that 2012 has not been everything I had hoped for and more...yet! To say that it has started off pretty rocky would be quite the understatement, and it it is so tempting to just throw my hands in the air and say, "You win, 2012, I give up!" It would be incredibly easy to just resign myself to having a bad year and settle for whatever that may look like. But guess what, 2012? I refuse to give up! Sure, January and the majority of February have been quite the test of faith, but I still have ten and a half months left in this crazy year to turn things around. So that's what I'm going to do. Each month for the rest of 2012 my goal is to do something for me--something fun, something daring, something I've dreamed of doing and just haven't gotten around to yet. Sure, my budget is somewhat limited, but that doesn't mean I can't make the most of it. So here are some ideas I have already come up with, and I'd be more than happy to have some feedback or ideas from any of you who are reading.

February: I need some sort of change. I've been throwing around the idea of chopping my hair (like shoulder-length...ah!), going on a shopping spree, and getting a tattoo (my parents already want to disown me for even THINKING about that one!). I have already made a hair appointment for this weekend while I am at home in Akron, so we'll see how drastic it really is!

March: Road trip to DC with my good friend Stacey to visit my big sister. Hoping to meet up with some friends and just have a good time. Also planning on doing a 3-4 mile race on St. Patrick's Day!

April: No ideas yet...but I'm sure they will come!

May: Running the Cleveland Half-Marathon in honor of my 25th birthday! I decided that I wanted to do something different to celebrate this birthday, and running a half-marathon is something healthy and definitely rewarding. Training is already in progress and I am excited to take this on!

I haven't yet thought about the rest of the year. I know that I have off work from the second week of May until August 1st, which leaves plenty of time for vacations! I am still debating whether or not to get a job over the summer to make some extra money or to just relax and enjoy some "me time." I plan on staying at Muskingum for another academic year and am looking forward to making the most of my time here. I realize that this is not a "forever" job for me, but I am prepared to use this time to learn more about myself, to meet new people, and to explore different opportunities.

For the rest of 2012 (and beyond, of course), I refuse to sit idly by while my life happens to me. It's my turn to decide what my future will look like, what goals I am going to achieve, and who I will allow to be by my side throughout all of it!

And we'll end with a song:

Kate Voegele Cover Competition

Hey everyone!

I recently (as in tonight) entered Kate Voegele's "Got Kate Covered" competition. Seeing as how Kate is one of the musicians I look up to most, I decided I should enter for fun. The song I covered, "I Couldn't Save You," is one of my favorites of hers. The YouTube video of my cover is below. If you could go to the video on YouTube and "Like" it under the video window I would so appreciate it. The most "Likes" wins. You are all awesome. Thanks for your support!

Reflections and Goals

I know it's January 5th, but I am just now getting to the blog post where I reflect on the past year, talk about what I've learned, and make goals for the new year. Better late than never, right?

2011 was an interesting year, to say the least. There were ups and downs, that's for sure, and so many changes. There was love, there was loss, and at times it was difficult to handle all that was going on around me. At the end of the day, though, I think the best thing we can do is to learn from our experiences and take that knowledge with us as we continue on throughout our lives.

When I say that there was "loss" in 2011 I guess it means a variety of different things, but mostly it means that God took two great men from this earth who are deeply missed by many. The first was Jim, my boss for the last seven years at the candy store I started working at in high school. I blogged about it back in October when it happened, but I don't think I realized the enormity of the loss until Christmas this year. I wasn't initially planning to go back to the store this year what with having a "real job" and all, but I knew Jim's wife, Janene, could use some extra help and moral support. It was definitely weird to be there and not have Jim there. It didn't feel the same and our typically joyful Christmas Eve feast was definitely missing a huge component. On the other hand, though, we laughed...a lot. There was never a dull moment between trying to figure out what to do when one of the machines broke (that was always Jim's job) or creating an awesome batch of caramels. There were the butter creams that were a little too creamy, and there were several hours I spent rolling out creams and truffles, just like Jim taught me. I never thought I would be doing those things without him, but had to smile at the memories of him teaching me. The number of customers who came in expressing their sympathy and sadness at the loss of Jim is truly a testament to how much he was and is loved.

Another loss came more recently. My dad's mom, Mimi, is a twin and is best friends with her sister, my Aunt Nancy. My Mimi and Papa and Aunt Nanci and her husband, Uncle Dick, did so much together. They came to all of our family gatherings and were basically like another set of grandparents to us. My Uncle Dick had not been doing well lately, suffering from a heart attack over the summer. Unfortunately he suffered another one at the end of November and passed away. The funeral was difficult, as all of us great-nieces and nephews participated in a reading, and my part was to remind everyone at the funeral that my Uncle Dick loved everyone there...and the truth is, he really did. I can honestly say without being dramatic or exaggerating that my life would be so incredibly different if it weren't for my Uncle Dick. The land my parents' house is built on was owned by him. My parents were looking at buying land in Wadsworth when they had a conversation with my uncle and he gave them a really good deal on this land that he owned (when I say "really good deal" I mean my mom threw out a random number joking around and he said, "okay!"). If it weren't for him I would not have grown up in Akron, gone to Woodridge, or met many of the people who play a huge role in my life now. Because of his generosity I grew up in a home I love in an area I love and created some awesome friendships along the way. Uncle Dick was able to make it to my parents' anniversary party in October and could not have seemed happier to be there. I am so thankful to have that last memory with him.

2011 was also a year of big changes. I graduated with my Master's Degree on my birthday in May, which was super exciting, and had already accepted a job doing something I loved. At the end of July I moved a little under two hours away from home to work as a counselor at a small university. It was definitely an adjustment moving that far from home without knowing anyone, and I was anxious about how things would be. With that being said, the adjustment to such a small town has taken some time, but the people I work with are great. Around the same time that I moved, one of my best friends got engaged and moved to LA! I am so incredibly happy for her, but the three hour time difference makes it hard to connect sometimes, and I find myself missing our friendship. There were so many other changes, as well, but I feel as though that is way too much to get into at this point!

All in all, 2011 had its moments, but I am so excited that it is a new year and I am ready to take it by storm. The first crazy, stupid, impulsive decision I made of 2012 was to register for the Cleveland Half-Marathon on May 20th. I figured that last year I graduated with my Master's on my birthday, I had to do something even more exciting this year (since I'll be 25 and all), so why not a half-marathon? I'll tell you why: because I am not a runner...yet! Goal is to start training tomorrow, and maybe in 20 weeks I'll be ready! Other than that, I'm just hoping to make the most out of 2012. I'm not going to wait around for opportunities anymore, but instead create them for myself. I want to make the most of every moment I'm given, and appreciate the little things. I'm trying to start the year with a more positive outlook (I can tell you I definitely did not do that last year) and live my life the way I want it to. I have some other more long-term goals in my mind, and who knows whether or not I'll accomplish them in the upcoming years. All I know is that right now I'm ready to turn things around and make 2012 the best that I can. I realize now that how my year is, how each day is really, is only determined by me: my attitudes, my actions, my reactions. I'm ready to take it on.